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Cheese on Toast★
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Thursday, 3 April 2014 // 3:38:00 am

Shoot It's 3am and now is the time I'm starting to panic about my assessment due tomorrow. I really will need to isolate myself from people as much as I need company and from my phone and laptop. I need to make a friend who will become my serious study buddy who tells me off and gives me a push to do my work. Man I'm going to like be so sensitive today because I reckon I'm going to burst into tears at random times just as stress relief. Why do most of my assessments consist of writing 1700 words. I'm so STRESSED. Anyways I'll stop complaining and talking about this stuff because I have concluded it's attention seeking behaviour and is like purposely generating sympathy and pity, which I don't like. I'll see you on the otherside.

Also yesterday I realise my voice gets lost a lot. It's something that happens to me often and that is if I'm with a group of people like 4 or more, often when I say something it doesn't get heard admist those more outspoken and louder than me. And since noone hears what I say, I just brush it aside and pretend I never said it. Maybe I just have one of those voices noone can really hear properly amongst a group of people. One of those voices that can't be understood unless I strain it to be a little louder. One of those voices that are excluded and forgotten easily because I choose to remain silent.

Here goes sitting in the library for the next 10 hours gg.

I really ceebs anymore.
Someone please tell me the word I'm looking for.

So uhh...Nickybaby was eager to give me something today and so whatevs I went and met up with him and he says he has a present for me. And I'm instantly thinking what on earth, what could this person possibly have for me, and then he hands me a Nivea strawberry lipbalm. What. HAHA. It's japanese too, so I have no idea where he got a hold of this. I bet he had it stashed in a draw and it's been there for centuries. Why does he have girl's strawberry lip balm I don't even know. Well at least it smells good 8) Smells like strawberry zappos!

Spontaneous remission (failed assumption of healing): when you think you've hit rock bottom where things can't get any worse therefore it will stop and it will get better. False, because you re-engage in that activity anyways because you put no consistent effort into improvement. E.g. binge drinking. You drink a lot, kill your liver, vomit heaps, go straight back into it. This better be in the exam.

GEEZ INCONSIDERATE PEOPLE. THIS IS A FRIGGIN LIBRARY. SHUT UP. I don't know what they're doing, it certainly doesn't seem like work. They're playing videos and music and talking extremely loudly. So boisterous. People are trying to do work by themselves here. I can hear their every word and I have my earphones in just to shut them out. sheesh.

LOL this guy, says he going to come and study, nekminit snoring hehe :P

I just had the most traumatising experience...MY POOR HEART. So I got to my bus stop at 7.45 so it was really dark by then and I had to walk through this alleyway, which I have never walked through before in the dark. It looks scary enough when there's light let alone IN THE DARK. Top it off when it's pitch black there is friggin lightning flashing all over the place. So I'm walking through the dark alleyway and then it would light up from the lightning. THEN I was looking down at my phone for a few seconds and when I look up the lightning flashes AND THERE WAS A FIGURE THERE GOD D: Talk about movie scene.

Day 23.

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